Gang-Lift

Gang-Lift

v. To lift multiple ITEMS at once—as from a CASE—by using two hands to squeeze the first and last ITEM towards one another, so that intervening ITEMS are held in place by friction, and all may be moved together as a single unit: “Gang-lift Cheerios® to throw half a case at once” —n. Any lift so made.

NOTE: The beauty of a Gang-Lift is it's fast. Two grabs may be all it takes to empty an entire CASE. Squeeze down low, as contents tend to settle. Thus, the bottoms of BOXES are generally firmer than the tops.

Candidates? General MillsTM breakfast cereals are CASED on trays with banded covers specifically to enable such rapid handling. Then there's elbow macaroni, boxed macaroni and cheese, dog biscuits, and so on.

TIP: Corner Rip? If a CASE is too tight, and you're sure it'll all GO, rip open the CASE'S corner to create enough space to easily slide your hands down into the CASE on opposite sides.

Caution: Be gentle—don't squish, bend or disfigure anything! Also, watch out for slippery ITEMS that may squirt out like a deck of playing cards out of a bad shuffle, forcing you to play “52 Pick-Up” with the whole bunch. Better to reduce the number of units you lift at once.

Garbage Compactor

Garbage Compactor

n. A usually locked chute down which DEPARTMENTS may toss their garbage whenever the M.O.D. unlocks it and calls a CODE-G.

NOTE:

The compactor is kept locked to minimize SHRINK, which may include the accidental or intentional dumping of viable PRODUCT.

There are stories of rogue NIGHT CREWS (always at some other STORE, of course) who would occasionally trash portions of LOAD rather than take the time to THROW it. Urban legend? You decide.

TRUE STORY: You might never figure out how to start the Garbage Compactor's compacting mechanism unless somebody told you. I sure didn't. When told to empty all the trashcans in the BACKROOM, I stared at that control panel for a long time, pushed and jiggled this and that, and then finally just gave up and had to go ask someone. The secret?

TIP: Push Key to Start. Unusual, but to start the Garbage Compactor, push in the key. That's because it's not just a key, but a key sticking into a button. Pushing in the key thus pushes in the button, and that gets everything going.

Gate

Gate

n. Any of the roll-up tambour-style metal portcullis doors in the RECEIVING DEPARTMENT, which, when unlocked and opened via its hanging looped chain mechanism, provide via an adjustable cross-over DOCK PLATE approximately level walk-in access to the trailers brought by the TRUCK. The normal state of the Gate is closed and ARMED.

NOTE: Obviously, to open and close such a gate, you pull the chain down on one side of the other. But which side?

Answer: to open the gate, pull down on the side of the chain closest to the Gate itself, and the world outside. To close the Gate, pull down on the chain closest to you.

I know, I know—you're wondering why I'm telling you this. Well, sometimes the Gate gets caught or stuck. In those situations, it's not as if you could just tug gently on the two chains to see which does what. Brute force applied to the wrong chain is worse than pointless. So remember:

TIP: “Open = Outside,” and “Close = Closest.”

TRUE STORY: That way, at least you can be spared the embarrassment of someone else easily “fixing” it for you just by pulling on the proper side. (Is my face still red?)